Thursday, May 11, 2006


Today's Toastmaster's meeting was a very interesting one. The theme was "Discover your passion." It gave me incentive to think about what my passion really is. Heh, some of you are well aware that my passion really is more of an obsession. Well, at least one is.

The first question in Tabletopics was "What childhood passion have you rediscovered as an adult?" Unfortunately, Ondrej got that question instead of me. I know that answer... Curling. It's safe to say that a lot people remember me as "the curler," or "the one who likes to curl." Today, I'm wearing my Tim Horton's Roar of the Rings pullover from the Olympic Trials (Best Trip EVER!!!!!) Frequently, when I get asked Tabletopics questions, the answer is somehow related back to curling.

It's what I do. It's who I am. I've put aside my goal to be a competitive curler and really fear that it's too late to start now. How can someone get started if they can't even get put on a freakin' spare list for the superleague????? The good thing is that I likely enjoy curling more now, in a non-competitive atmosphere, than I would if I got competitive. However, I'd love to have that feeling of walking out onto the ice to the sound of bagpipes....

It really is no wonder people think I'm a little odd...a little out there. My goals aren't to go out and get drunk every weekend. They aren't to settle down and get married (damn me for falling into that trap) and have kids. I don't dream of becoming an executive, or the next Julia Roberts... You won't find me at Canadian Idol tryouts (heaven forbid...I'd make the cut for the worst of the worst episode!).

You will find me on the ice in the winter. Camping and fishing in the summer. My spare time is typically spent relaxing with a good book or some kind of grandma craft - crochet, cross stitch, quilting, etc. Right now I'm in the middle of planning a redecorate/renovate of my bedroom and ensuite. I have someone in my life...well, ok a few people in my life... who are right there beside me encouraging me and making me reallllllllllllllllllly excited about the prospect. They're not letting me let self-doubt rule.

So, tonight I work on that passion. Finishing up the shopping for my headboard, then off to a paint store to get suggestions on what to paint where. I have definite ideas, but after my last experience turned out a little too bright and.... ugly... I'm hoping to get some expert advice.

Travel is another passion. Ok, so I didn't have to mention that one since I have an entire blog devoted to it. (yay me!) Vegas in July is looking better and better. Sure, it isn't exactly my dream destination, but going there with T is definitely going to be fun. Tickets to O have been purchased. Plans made to hit some bars and relax by the pool. Even a shopping trip planned pre-trip so we can look our best. Reminds me... haircut needs to be booked.

Becoming a crazy cat lady has dropped on my list of passions. Yep, it was once high up there... Really, in some ways it's a much better option than living in an unhappy marriage or relationship. Waking up every morning hating the person you once loved and thought you could work anything out with. Walking through life unhappy, but not sure why; unfulfilled, but no clue how to change that; sacrificing your dreams and goals for someone who could never understand that and always wanted more.

I value my time alone much more now than I did before. When I was in my early twenties, I had this need to belong - to be like everyone else. In a "happy" relationship, someone to go home to at the end of the day...blah blah blah. (Is it any wonder I've been accused of being bitter and... oh right...envious of happy people???) I sought out what I felt I was supposed to seek out because that's what made the rest of the world happy. The fairy tale. The happily ever after. I chose to ignore those things that were huge red flags and settle for someone who made me mostly happy. He didn't even manage mostly happy.

Do I still want to be a crazy cat lady? Nuh uh. Sure, it's fun to talk about, but I have enough trouble cleaning up after 2 cats, much less 50. Besides, other people are too much fun to turn myself into a hermit because some are idiots. Which brings me to things that should become passions.

First... Friends.

I reconnected with an old friend from college today. She's working down the street and we met up for coffee. We both got busy and it was great to sit down with her and catch up on her life. She reconciled with her ex after a short separation a few years ago and they seem to be incredibly happy now. It's great to see because she went through some really rocky times in the past few years.

There are some I've angered, yet I'm not sure why. One just stopped emailing me and talking to me. Had a sushi night with the gang and that's the last I heard from them, despite a couple phone calls and emails that went ignored. It bothered me since he had made such an effort to keep in touch after I left AU, but I can't spend my time worrying about ghosts. If I knew what caused the silence then I could try to resolve it.

My two best friends from high school... Sheesh, D is expecting her second baby this month and I've pretty much neglected the phone calls and emails that I should have been following up with her on. J is happily married, living in a small town, 2 kids, a dog and a new house. While the rest of us have had marriage problems and divorces, they're blissfully happy - and she deserves every second of it.

Now, I'm off to write some emails.

Friday, May 05, 2006

To rant or not to rant, that is the question

Oh fine, I'll rant only because it needs to be said.

It's spring people. The weather is decidedly beautiful. Most days there isn't much wind. We haven't had a lot of rain or snow. The sun, while brighter than we're used to and out for more hours, isn't gonna hurt you if you have to wait for the bus outside instead of....

In the doorway to a freaking office building!

Yes, that area you are using as a bus shelter that is surprisingly well decorated with real glass and granite is actually a doorway. To a building. That marble flooring behind you is not a cleverly painted trompe l'oeil to give you a prettier backdrop for waiting for public transit... it's actually a functional building. Those doors on either side of you... yep, made for passing through into the building.

That entryway is not owned by the city, and yes, those people walking through your beautifully decorated bus shelter are not a mere inconvenience to you. They are using the area for what it was meant to be used for.

I could understand your need to wait inside when it was -30. Even -20. -10 was pushing it, but we all know how practically teenaged girls dress. It's all about proper attire for the weather with them, so fine... But it's SPRING. Things aren't going mouldy out there, they're turning green because that's what happens in the spring when it warms up.

And... it also means that when it's 20 freakin degrees out, it's the same temperature outside as it is in your luxurious bus shelter. Stand outside! Why do you feel any benefit at all to standing in an area that is meant for a different purpose? Do you like the added attention of people swearing as they have to manouver you and your friend who are sharing the headphones for that MP3 player? Is it the ability to lean against a perfectly operable door so people have one less to use?

Or do you just like people thinking you're extremely dense/stupid/lazy/self-indulgent/spoiled/rude/ignorant... I can go on, but I think you get the point. Grow up. If you're taking public transit, understand the difference between bus shelters and building entryways.