Cube with a blocked view.

Aaaaaaaaaarrgh

Sigh, here I sit. Looking off this little emotional ledge. Ok, the country music likely isn't helping, but I'm just at a point where it's all been too much.

There we go... superhero music. The Batman Begins Soundtrack.

So, I cried picking out a card for my grandma. Today I find out that she's at home with a bunch of new medications to take - and no idea which medication when, how much or how often. EEEeeek. Not so much the best strategy. Mom and dad went in and helped out with that.

It's harvest. Not exactly a time when my family has an excess of time to check on my grandparents. Sure, my sister-in-law will. But still.

I'm starting a bathroom reno that has me terrified. I think I can do it, but it always helps to have... help. Mom suggested Dad and Darcy may be able to use my vanity in the new shop. It's a good point. Maybe I can trade that for some help if things go sideways on me while I do this.

I'm just unsettled. Anxious. Feet are itching, but I've got no place to go. Nose is itching, but I lack a fool to kiss. I feel stagnant and invisible. Almost booked Vegas this afternoon. What good would that do, besides make me more invisible? I want to run, but I've got nowhere to run.

The tarot cards speak of change. Lots of change. Kinda a recurring theme there. Duh. Heartbreak, loneliness... really it's just a whole bunch of cheery sentiments. A new cycle beginning. Blah blah blah.

I'm overwhelmed and no one seems to get it. I don't even get it. It's not like there's that much going on.

So, once again... a scream of frustration.

AAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh

posted by Erin @ 3:29 PM