Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Ah, being sick. A time for me to contemplate life's mysteries. A time to think about who I am and what I want to be when I grow up.

It's been suggested that perhaps this blog is a part of my problem when it comes to guys - given that several have found it and read my words of "wisdom." Those are typically the ones that look at me and say, "hmm, let's be friends." Fair enough. Knowing that much about me can be... downright frightening. Any warnings I give that these are the extremes of my life, while surely understood, are hard to keep in mind. It hasn't really been said what in my writings could be the problem. So perhaps it's just the wealth of knowledge available when it really shouldn't be available.

But here's the thing...I do this for me. Some people understand that, some find hidden meanings in what gets written. I've taken some things too far and regret that. I've tried to keep this to inner conflicts and reflection on myself, yet sometimes that hasn't been so easy.

I'm an insomniac - mainly because when I lie down at night, I can't make my brain stop working. I think differently than other people. I've actually been driving down the road wondering if I had to code what I was doing, how I would do it. Case statements? If statements? What kind of functions could I build? That's nothing compared to the database I built today to compare the camping gear I want to buy. Prices, location, etc. It's all there complete with total cost of purchases by store if I were to buy it all at one place. Yep...geek. Hey, I had nothing else to do but cough, sniffle and sneeze!

Some may wonder what else goes through my head other than that which gets "published" here. Well, I do have a strong creative side that I've been neglecting recently. My writing shows best what goes through my mind when I'm laying in bed trying to sleep. And no, it isn't a giant case statement about the days events. I'm not talking about my blog either. This is just an accounting of the days that make up my life, and the funny, odd, weird situations I get into. And some of the painful stuff because life isn't all fun and games. You get the bad with the good, my friends.

I attempt to write fiction here and there, but, well I really need to learn how to plot a story and pace it. I'm working on that, but I tend to have a relatively short attention span and often want to move on to a different story before I get to far into one. Probably because in my mind, I already have the conclusion written and it's no fun anymore :-)

And here we see the cold-fogged state of my mind. I have no idea what point I wanted to make when I started this post.

Oooooooooh Shiny...


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