Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Expectations and Hope.

I have 15 minutes before I take off for lunch and I don't want to start anything new so....

I was told last night that there is a vague difference between expecting something and hoping something. Give some time to ponder that, I need to write down my thoughts to see if I've completely lost my mind.

They are similar simply because they describe emotions or a thought process. And they tend to have a positive connotation to them. It's rare to hear someone say "I fully expect to get shot today." It's even more rare to hear "I hope to get shot today," unless one is going in for a flu shot.

In my life, I truly hope things go well. I'm an eternal optimist. I look for the good in everything. The glass is half full unless it's empty. And seeing as I love the rain, clouds don't even need a silver lining. Rain is good, sun is good. Snow... well... it's a change and it means it's curling season so snow is good too. Plus, is there anything better than curling up in front of a fire to watch big, fat flakes of snow fall outside?

Now here is where the difference comes between the two words. Do I expect things to go well? This is me folks. I've come to the conclusion that when I expect the best, I get the worst. On nights when I go into the curling club expecting to win, every shot, every end is a struggle for me. When I go in anticipating a tough game or simply hoping to win, the game often goes better for me. It's likely a mental thing. Over-confidence.

Every date I've been on, I've hoped... hell, when I'm on a date, I hope I can put together enough coherent sentences to keep up with conversation and show SOME of my fascinating personality. I hope I can get through the date without injuring myself or someone else. And we all know that hasn't always happened. I'm still at the "hope" part on that one. If I ever get around to expecting a first date to go well... I should be sedated immediately. Check the number of cats in my home... I may have gone over the edge.

The final distinction I came up with is kinda interesting. My friends. They seem to expect me to get hurt. It's probably a reasonable expectation. And I for one totally expect to get hurt as well. It's something that can't be avoided in life.

The question is... do they HOPE I get hurt. And there is where the difference goes from vague to concrete.

It also makes me question what I said earlier. Expectations aren't always positively connotated. Which is really is the difference. One can expect bad things... but one rarely hopes for bad things.

Whew, I feel better now :)

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