Friday, November 02, 2007

Letting Go

It's funny. I used to feel this need to have everything go my way. I tried to control things - very ineffectually since I'm pretty much not aggressive in the least (well, except maybe on the ice, but that's different). Last spring, that passive-aggressive control thing became an issue. After some counselling where I dealt with anger issues as well as how to assert myself, things have changed - significantly.

Don't get me wrong, it wasn't just the counselling. It's having a couple good role models in acceptance and peace. It's finding people I value in my life and getting rid of the ones I'd hoped would change. It's accepting myself with all my flaws and doing the same for others.

Regardless, all aspects of my life seem to have squirted through their respective bottlenecks and are now flowing along smoothly. This week, I got the news of a promotion at work. Up a pay level recognizing my hard work.

Curling is effortless all of a sudden. I'm not trying to force anything - even on the ice. I'm back to auto-pilot. I call the shots and they get made (or not) and things still turn out just right. Undefeated in my ladies league.

And finally things with J absolutely perfect. We've now survived 2.5 reno's. A bathroom, flooring and finally pushing an extension off the bedroom for more closet space. We're living in an extremely cramped spare bedroom with a queen bed, 2 night tables, a dresser and exercise equipment without a single argument. I think it helps that he's doing it while he's off work and it isn't stressing him at all. It may change when he starts the new job later this month, but I don't think he'll be nearly as stressed as he had been before leaving his last job.

The families met last weekend and things went wonderfully. We had dinner Saturday night, then J's mom made dinner Sunday night and invited us all over. It was great after spending 2 days laying laminate.

And now I look ahead. T and I may be hitting the airport again - this time with a greater destination in mind. Europe somewhere - the final destination is yet to be determined, but it should be fantastic. Using J's tour company from his Turkey trip. But more on that as our plans get solidified. I need to start realizing my travel dreams. Being debt free is going to speed up much of that. Soon money won't be a concern and we've lived through renovations (another reason high on the list for divorce).

But it's time for a meeting and earning that promotion and raise. Have a good couple weeks folks, it would seem I have little to say lately.


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