Sunday, June 05, 2005


Well, my first post of the day was somewhat angry and bitter, which isn't like me most of the time. So I need to make sure I end the day with something a bit more me.

Five years ago, I moved to Edmonton. At the time, I had no idea what was in store for me up here. And I hadn't yet met three people who would become some of my better friends. My Evil Twin, Sushi Boy and G.

The evil twin. I never thought I'd meet someone so much like me. The evil one actually started working at the same company as me a few years ago when I was writing ambulance software. She was hired part time to help out our office manager. We didn't even really become friends then. We talked and hung out once in awhile, and added each other to our MSN lists. Over time a friendship built and now... well, heck, she's one person I can always count on to be there.

Last thursday, she knew I was upset about stuff. So, having Friday off, she came to Edmonton and we went out for raw fish. It was more of a distraction for me than anything else, but I appreciated what she did for me. She's also threatened to stay with me for a weekend in June when someone comes to town to see me. Apparently I'm not old enough to make my own decisions. Don't tell her (yeah, right, she reads this darned thing), but it probably isn't the worst idea in the world and I have my own reservations about that weekend as it is. But I like to think I can take care of myself. Heck, I did last night. Ok, OK, I got my own butt in trouble.

She's my guard dog. She's told my ex to stay away from me. She's had words with a guy who's hurt me. She's asked for the MSN address of every guy I talk to. I think she wants to threaten him if I get hurt again. Needless to say,she doesn't get a lot of MSN addresses anymore. But hey, it feels good to have someone care that much.

Sushi boy. Met him when I started at AU... 2 years ago now. He's kinda a shy guy, pretty quiet overall until he gets to know someone. He is partially responsible for introducing me to sushi. And that's how we got to know each other. Since leaving AU, the friendship has continued with he and his fiancee as well as G and his wife. We have monthly sushi outings around the city and weekly coffee, when I can make it. I don't always get there but whenever I do, I'm welcomed.

They worry about me. When I date someone new, they like to know about it and get the details. Sushi Boy is frighteningly close to reality with some of his analysis of the guys I've dated. Give him enough information and he's off doing searches online to see what he can dig up about a given male. Again, all just concerned about me. He and the Evil Twin have never met, but now have each other on MSN so they can co-ordinate their efforts to scare off any potential dates. He is however reading my blog and letting me know that this morning's post may not be coming across quite how I meant it to.

I'm frustrated at the quality of men I've met to this point in my life. I'm tired of the expectation of sex, whether there's an assumption it's been too long for me, or being "recently" separated, I need some kind of validation that I can get from males in the form of sex. Hmm, that was a long, awkward sentence... The eternal optimist in me wants to believe that there are men out there who are not just looking to take a woman to bed. Recent experiences may show otherwise, but I refuse to give up.

Finally, we have G. Another former AU employee. He worked helpdesk there when I started. Then he left and returned in the same position. Now, he's at the U of A in a much more deserving position. He's a lot more quiet about my situation, except telling me last week it would be easy for me to go out and get laid if I wanted to. I don't think he realized I'd already learnt the truth of that statement. But I don't want to just get laid. WIth the right person? LOL, it has been awhile and with the right person...well, he'd better be well rested. Sigh, that just sounds bad again. Sushi boy is going to have a lot of fun with this blog entry.

But G is a good guy. I'm not sure I appreciate the discussions about my life when I'm not around, but as long as G keeps reminding folks I'm an adult and I'm pretty good at taking care of myself it's all good. And, hey, what can you say about a group of people who don't set me up on blind dates? At my request of course. They're all good people and I know they care about me.

But now it's late and I need to get my butt to work early in the morning.